Revenge of the Turkey

Ahhhhhhh...Thanksgiving. One of the best holidays of the year. A holiday centered around food, family, and most importantly: tradition. It is easy to take tradition for granted, and unexpectedly hilarious things can happen when someone throws a wrentch in your routine.

Here is a sneak peek at our typical Thanksgiving traditions:

1. Thanksgiving Eve: We join our friends at the local "townie" bar, to see old faces and celebrate the long weekend.
2. Spend the night in my mother's guest room, to stay close to all the happenings of the next day.
3. Thanksgiving Morning: We join Jared's family for the annual morning bowling. I always lose.
4. Thanksgiving early afternoon: Return to my mom's house to grab all of the delicious foo...

...knock knock knock...

"Mom!"

...pound pound pound...

"Mooooooooooom!!"

Silence.

She locked me out of the house. Even worse, she also locked all of my food, that I had spent the entire night before preparing, inside the house. Ugh.

I make my way to all 5,000 windows in the house to see if any are left open just enough for me to slide through. No luck. The place is locked up like Fort Knox.

Just as I am ready to give up, I realize that I skipped the sliding glass door to the basement. I make my way down to the hill, and as I approach the door a large dark figure that previously resembled a rock comes barrelling at me, coming so close to knocking me over that I feel the air from his feathers blow across my face.

Yes...feathers.

As a scream escapes my throat I finally make out what the object is...

GOOD LORD, IT'S A TURKEY!!

I stand in shock and watch the obese bird run faster than any animal or human I have ever seen run in my life, hauling ass down our hill, across the street, and into the woods.

I fall over laughing. I am, in fact, just about to eat his cousin; the least he can do is give me a heart attack. Oh the irony...

In spite of the locked up food and turkey attack, we had a great Thanksgiving :)